On Happiness

Happiness-is..

What is Happiness?

hap·pi·ness

noun: happiness; plural noun: happinesses; the state of being happy.

synonyms:

pleasure, contentment, satisfaction, cheerfulness, merriment, gaiety, joy, joyfulness, joviality, jollity, glee, delight, good spirits, lightheartedness, well-being, enjoyment;

This a question, I’ve pondered and constantly come back to. This new Spring season has awakened new aspects of myself and I suddenly am seeing life in a whole new perspective. I was once on quest to find my inner joy. Something deep within me was no longer satisfied going by the every day norm and doing what people ‘thought’ was best for me. i.e. – working the 9-5 job, getting promoted, designer clothes, going out to bars, binge drinking, and other somewhat ‘normal’ things other girls in their mid twenties were typically seeking. That stuff did not matter, I needed something more. I yearned to wake up feeling satisfied, to get up with excitement for my day, and wanted to make ideas happen that would help this world be a better and brighter place. After a series of unexpected events, and with what I’d like to deem a magical and crazy Spiritual Awakening, I am emerging out of what was, and allowing myself to radiant forward  – in the best ways I possible can.

Life has taught me so many lessons in the past three years, and in the entirety of my life as I look back and reflect. I believe that happiness is an inside job. It’s more than just proclaiming today I am happy, because we all know there are many circumstances that happen that cause us to feel otherwise. You can read a ton of books, follow people online, even post things on Facebook that seem uplifting. That’s wonderful, and maybe you are inspiring someone in the process. The more our planet elevates in consciousness the more I witness people posting tons and tons of stuff all over social media about how to find your inner joy or some other regurgitated quote or message. Why? I’m really not sure. True, real happiness, I believe, is about finding ways to please yourself fully and live whole in who you are. It’s not doing, it’s Living. It about waking up and looking forward to whatever you have on your schedule and being eager to share your energy to the world. It’s about doing things you love and surrounding yourself with people who let you be the best you can be. And rather than seeking people, things, jobs, money, etc, it’s about dancing on your own path to self acceptance and joy.Happiness is a choice

So many of us cultivate this attitude of limitation. We want to do this, however we can’t because of this. Or we think we need a certain person, or need to do a certain thing to be happy. We say to ourselves I love doing this and I’d love to do more of this but —-. And so our world doesn’t change. I believe Happiness is found when you are able to live in complete awareness of who you are – not what your family, friends, or society tells you to be. Is it easy? Fuck no. It takes work, it means breathing past your challenges and overcoming yourself so you can serve yourself in the best ways possible. It’s more than just saying you are happy. What is that? Do you feel happy on the inside? Can you break free from your own patterns and choose to face the real thing that is holding you back from your own complete happiness? Are you willing to get into your body and feel alive and as good you can be? Can you put down the weed, beer, or glass of wine, and instead of drinking to feel something and later your state of consciousness – can you be willing to come to terms with the struggle and take conscious motion forward to freedom? The truth is too many of us are just to scared. They are held back in the fear of what if I were willing to change my life? Scared of investing in themselves, of what change may bring, of getting out of their routine, and going beyond what is comfortable or dare I say ‘normal.’ Then habits continues, routines go on for years, the same type of people come in, the same problems, and people wonder why their life is the way it is. Ha. Ha.

Walking a path of happiness and fulfillment is a path you take on your own. It looks different to everyone. Yes, you have people who support you along the way and guide you and are in your life for a reason. But Happiness is your own inner journey. It’s not about doing what this person does, or thinking your dreams will come true by reading a book and following it or reciting it. To me, Happiness is about learning to make choices that serve you. Happiness is not an act, it’s a way of living. Do the things that please you, and find satisfaction in every moment of your day. Love the life you choose for yourself. If you don’t like it, change it, or something about it. You can spend a lot of time and money searching for the perfect partnership, the job that will fulfill you, or the thing that will finally let you feel satisfied. Where is the fun in that? Why do we settle for less than we deserve? Why not choose right now to commit to yourself. To who you are on the inside. To stop thinking you need other people to awaken your inner joy, and choose to live it for yourself. As the planet changes and more and more people are seeking ways to live life well. It’s wonderful! I hope we can all learn to do the best we can to inspire one another. Happiness is more than just a mantra, activity, or necessity. True happiness is living your life with a sense of purpose and fulfillment. To be okay when things happen, knowing it needs to be that way. To allow yourself to dig into your feelings and inner wisdom and love yourself from the inside first. It’s about trusting yourself to take measures to live better, invest in yourself, and instead of seeking something outside of yourself, to seek it within.

Life happens and it teaches you to grow in yourself. Be positive and live well. Obstacles and challenges will happen. The universe throws you curve balls. It’s okay to crhappinessy about it and be upset. Sometimes, you probably won’t be in your best state. That’s truth – that’s the work. Don’t lie to yourself – accept it. To refine your where you are and to make positive changes so you can live better; not for anyone, or to have something, or gain something. Happiness is something that is locked up within us all. Some of us express it and tap into it more than others. I believe real happiness is being able to look at your reflection and see all aspects of yourself and to honestly evaluate what aspects you may need to overcome. Who cares what society thinks, and lets let go of the ‘normal’, or the idea that your have to ‘be okay and friendly and smile’ in every minute of the day. That’s bullshit. Life happens and things can hurt – but it’s in your ability to learn why where the work takes place. Reality is, we are all never okay – admit it, and own it. I tell ya it’s a whole lot better to face your fears, your emotions, and to start to ask the question – ‘why isn’t this working for me anymore?’. Happiness is an exploration of yourself. It’s about stopping the habits and the old ways we think we need to live our life. It’s not about how many facebook posts you make, or your ‘like’s and followers, or what you choose to gossip and complain about. It’s not about showing up with a smile either. Happiness is finding joy in every second of living. You do that by getting through the battle and challenges and finding self acceptance. For me, it’s laughing when things happen that don’t make sense. It’s smiling at the stranger who just cut you off in traffic, and it’s breathing in your own sense of self to feel awakened in YOU. No one needs anything. To find happiness, you do the work, you tune into your self – your body  and heart – and YOU consciously choose to better yourself. You let your spirit guide you forward, and you trust the beat with in you to lead you forward… in whatever way that may be….cuz it’s different for us all.Real Journey

People inspire. Books inspire. Life causes you to become something more [if you are willing]; Life teaches. Happiness is an inner journey that promotes confidence within who you are. It may be lonely, confusing, and very surreal at times. It takes time, it’s not something we are born with innately – it’s a unique process. Only when you dare to get deeper, can you truly prosper. I went through a three year shift that taught me more about myself than I could have ever imagined. Did I plan it? No, events happened that taught me to grow fuller in myself and it took a lot of tears to overcome, and I was blessed to have teachers help me along the way. Ultimately it was my own commitment that has gotten me to where i am now. Letting go what I thought I needed or wanted, and trusting there is always more to come. I had to break free and stop doing what I did all my life, and in the process it liberated me and has helped me become fulfilled. This week I invite you to do something nice for yourself. To plan a schedule with activities that will inspire a smile on your face and to notice why it brings you fulfillment. Maybe it’s even taking an hour to be alone journey solo in what you enjoy. We all seek on the outside to feel better about ourselves. Why not harness your own happiness first then let the world be filled with it? Step into love for who you are and live your life by finding happiness in who you really are and all that you actually enjoy 😉 What is happiness to you? Can YOU OWN it and ACCEPT it and LIVE it??

 

 

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Stuck in a Rut?

Have you ever just felt stuck? Like nothing you do matters, you don’t know clearly what your ambitions are, and you just lost, and very off. I have, on different occasions.Perhaps you are not following your heart, working at achieving your dreams, or maybe you’re just very confused and lost between what you really want, what you have, and how to get it. Or many times I just have no idea what’s going with my body, mind, and emotions, and just feel lost in a fog. It’s hard to describe.

I’ve had a roller coaster of feelings like this. It was not until I was able to finally let go of everything, all my attachments, my thoughts of what I should be doing, who I should be, that I was able to rise above and find pure happiness. I wandered around like a lost lonely duck, searching for my pond and flock where I belonged. I did  not know what was wrong or how to describe what was going on, I just did not feel excellent. I keep to myself too much, do things alone, and enjoy the company of myself, but not always in a healthy way. One day my favorite yoga teacher, a very special friend, unexpectedly asked to get coffee after class, apparently she could tell something was wrong, and she cared enough to try to help. We chatted briefly, but in that quick half an hour something within me began to release. I felt alive and empowered after just having a conversation. That was my doorway that led me to get out of my fog and clear up my life. Sometimes it’s the simple act of communicating and voicing your feelings, so that you can uncover your own power and personal contentment. Also, that amazing feeling when you realize that someone else truly cares about you. Woah. Too often we get stuck in ourselves, our ways, our drama. We are afraid as a society to reach out, or scared to let others know how we really feel, and then we hold it all in, only creating more stagnation and emotions. Why can’t we all roam the world as little kids? Being honest with ourselves, how we feel, what we want to do, and smiling and giggling all day long? I hold things in all the time, and I’ve learned that my other modalities to happiness: music, the ocean, running, dont always work. I need people, friends, community. Sometimes the most effective thing you can do is just chat with another human, a friend, and pleasantly exchange ideas, laugh, or sip coffee. After all, how good does it feel when someone asks you genuinely, How are you doing today? Or when you get an invitation to do something? Or just a nice smile and compliment in the middle of your day? It’s these happy feelings that help us get unstuck, and notice why we are not operating at 100% magnificence. Once you begin shifting your patterns, negative habits, transformation happens magically, and you begin to experience the joy of living happy.

“The second sutra concerning sauca speaks to the energetic experience of purifying and cleansing. We practice sauca and we become happy….as we deepen our yoga practice, we become happy for no apparent reason, as we fundamentally change the way we move through our days. In fact, out lives change so radically that we forget why it was we were unhappy in the first place. Our new found happiness appears to be for no reason. In truth, we are happy because we have applied the principles of yoga to our lives…If we are to find lasting happiness, we must not only clean up our rooms but clean up our thoughts as well. Fortunately, that is precisely what the practice of yoga is all about. To begin, we let go. We let go of our thoughts, our old scripts, out expectations, our darkness. The solution is not to fight but to let go. We let go of everything and hold on to nothing. Over and over again, on the mat and off, we let go. This letting go is a purification. We let go and it is like dropping a pebble into a pond, the ripples slowly growing to encompass our every waking moment. In out letting go we create an emptiness, a space that health and grace will move into. We begin to live with a joyful awareness.” [Rolf Gates]

Consider the following: what have you been eating? Greasy foods, heavy meals, meat, flour, have the tendency to deflate your mood. Load up on greens and other super foods! Have you been drinking too much? I often feel depressed after I’ve had too many cocktails in a weekend. Water purifies the soul, so neutralize your system by chugging h2o instead. Order a water with lemon at the bar and I’m sure your friends wont know the difference between that and a vodka water or tonic.

“When the body is cleansed, the mind if purified and the sense controlled, joyful awareness, needed to realize the inner self, also comes” [Yoga Sutas]

Some Solutions~

Journal. What is bringing you down? Causing this fog? What makes you happy, what is not? Find the underlying root issues. Get your emotions, fears, thoughts out on paper so you may find more clarity

Talk to someone. If you have a friend, partner, brother, sister, maybe share with them how your are feeling. Maybe it’s something in the seasons, the air, that’s going around. Or maybe they can shed a new light on the situation. Regardless, getting it out does wonders! You would be surprised.

Get outside. Now a days too many people get stuck inside, sitting at desks, watching TV, sitting at bars, etc. Get outdoors and do something fun, maybe it’s just a simple walk, or watching the sunset on the beach. By getting in touch with nature, the fresh air, you will feel so much more grounded. Get out of your house, yours office chair, your car, and spend some time enjoying the ambiance of the outdoors.

Get moving. I notice myself falling down a sad slope when I get lazy, sleep in, eat poor, and dont find time to sweat. Working out helps activate your body, your breath, fuel your system, and help flush and release toxins and things that may get ‘stuck’. Personally I enjoying jumping in the ocean in the summer and just rinsing and letting go. There is something magical in salt water. I also love to sweat and enjoy hot yoga, especially on days I’m feeling down. Let all my thoughts drip away. Try running, walking, biking, sitting in a park, anything that gets you to find your space, breathe, and get your body going.

Go Green. Take 3 days and eat only natural foods. Load up on greens, smoothies, fruits, and stay away from processed stuff, frozen meals, meat, rice, coffee, caffeine, etc. You’ll be amazed how much better your feel.

Music. Find some music that grounds and calms you and listen to it daily. I always burn a new CD when I get into a funk and burn happy, often obnoxious songs that elevate my spirits. Then I drive around town and sing them in my car while blasting them. I get some funny looks, but so what? My playlist is always changing, but some of my fave artists are: Bon Iver, One Republic, Jack Johnson, Jason Mraz, The Beatles, Glee Soundtrack, Garden State Soundtrack

– Get Rid of your Shit. Yup, some dont like to talk about this, but it’s important. You need to take a dump and get rid. A healthy ddigestive system usually goes at least once a day, although everyone is different. Think about it, you don’t want that food you ate to be sitting in your system all day or week. Your body should take what it needs and get rid of the rest. I take probiotics and digestive enzymes that help keep things moving. There are many different colon cleanses and fasts. I recently experimented with this product to the right and loved it. I’d recommend it to anyone just feeling stuck (in more ways than one) and needs an aid to help their digestion and elimination. Get it at a Whole Foods near you.

Find your Happiness. Elevate. Change…The Goal –>