Thank You America!
I just watched the 2015 4th of July fireworks from a cement bench on the bayside of San Diego, a place I routinely visit and walk or ride by bike by daily. I had no hand to hold me, no liquid toxicity within me, and no one even with me to share the evening firework display. I did have my headphones and some great music on shuffle to listen to and hum along to as I watched the magnificent light show in the sky.
Freedom. Red, white, and blue… well lots of red tonight. The sky lit with fire and sparks and bombs in the air that burst to sparkle the still dark water beneath it. Lights pulsed from the dark in the twilight as people gathered from all around. America, how beautiful… for the first time in what very well maybe my whole life I felt at peace. Totally calm, totally cool, and totally okay… what was this ecstatic state and how was I totally fine in the midst of being alone on one of the most social holidays of the year… and wait, I was dead sober and alone, and still completely happy.
Oh say can you see, while watching that night sky dance with color I witnessed the real magic that I had been missing…. Freedom. A word we hear quite often, yet I still have not yet accurately described the sensation or meaning of the letters. In the moment, I gazed around and at the scenery of the people, the drunks sneaking the beer, the tipsy crew singing along to the star spangled sky, the kids wanting to go home, the cops trying regulate, the bonfires that had their own sparkle show, the friends gathered tight, the couples holding hands, and all the people, for a moment, coming together for a profound scene of peace and joy. Hallelujah America! We did it, and I got to watch while the lights gallantly streamed through the sky.
Then I remembered what this holiday is all about and the real meaning in celebrating what it means to be American and happy and free. It’s as if the Universe opened up, and better than a broomstick, glitter rang out from the heavens in a spell of ease and delight. Not a single person I could see was upset, and not a single person dared to ruin the moment for another or even fight or exchange an unkind word. All that mattered was the proof in the sky that our country was together, the land of the free and the home of the brave. It was as if a spangled banner with stars and stripes was actually waving from the sky. Even with all the ugliness the world can hold, the bombs that bleed, the curses, and the evil spells that cause us fright and despair, and with the fights and the nasty currents that consume us, all of that seemed to be put on pause, irrelevant, and as if vanished, all was still, and all was well. The only music was the show in the sky and a few quite songs being sung by we the people.
With the bliss bombs bursting in air, in that moment, I felt the true meaning of freedom and witnessed what it is like to live in a Country that is united and perhaps even free. Together as one, happy and at peace, that was proof that America really can be beautiful and come together. Amazing grace. I was gifted a glimpse of how, maybe someday, I can imagine a world that stops, and looks up to remember the real stars in the sky that help us stand taller, shine brighter, and wave our hands in celebration… Peace, Life, Liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. It is possible. I just got a captivating picture of it and watched a stellar show that proved we can all shine together and blow up sweeter than any cake you’ll even consume.
This fourth of July, I am grateful. I do not accurately know the last time I was fully sober, without a drink, without a buzz, and without any other soul, on America’s finest day. Happy, solo, and totally amazed at the beauty of inner peace, inner light, and inner strength, to be able to sing freely and be totally content with me. The best freedom of all comes from the pure blissful state of knowing you are never lost, but always found. This night I learned that freedom to me, is not an action, a party, and it’s never laced with bubbles or another hand to high five or salute. Real freedom is being in your spirit and anchored in joy with the real effect that causes fireworks not only in a moment, but in every waking day from the inside out. The freedom to be totally happy with only me was the freedom I was once searching for all along and yearning to feel and desired to have…needing nothing, yet having everything. On this night, under a cloudy beautiful sky, I felt it, and actually believed in it.
But oh, America, what a gift I was granted today. To be completely alone, without anyone, and no one, yet completely happy, liberated, and profoundly actually free. Thank You America. For sharing your grace, shining your light, and showing me that brotherhood and sisterhood can shine from sea to sea. With spacious skies, purple fireworks of majesties, I experienced the amber waves that the Universe shed with music from the sea, on me. What a dream to be radically happy, smiling for no reason, and totally high on my own sweet elixir and with my own self. Freedom, I found you. Not even a selfie could prove it was real, boast about, or say that it happened. Yet the liberation remains, even after the rockets shot off.
America, today you gave freedom. Today, I remembered the best gift I was granted and had all along. America, thank you. Standing overlooking the bay I grew up with, the beach I see daily, and the water I regularly swim in, I remembered the best and more real divine magic show ever made. I returned home, and saw, for the first time, a country that I actually felt a part of, and actually was proud to live in. Freedom is a choice we are all given. Through the perilous fight, with liberation, we can attain the land of the free, and the home of the heart that needs nothing for total satisfaction and ultimate glory. Thank you America, for lighting my world up today, and better in every other day after, and showing me that peace is possible, and that maybe one day we will be the land of the free and home of the happy brave people we are meant to be. Even after the bombs drop, the stars can still shine and burst forever. Tonight I celebrate me. Tonight I cheers to let freedom ring forever and always!
Written by: Kali Bliss